voidtreckernet | who am i: jelly 17 (cw: mentions of death/identity/spoilers)

[ Scene: Mami in the greenhouse, with a fluffy leaf-green hedgehog on her shoulder. ]

Hi everyone...

I wanted to let you know about something more serious. It's about who...or what I am. So this doesn't surprise you later. I guess some of you already knew I wasn't quite what I appeared to be, but I'm still processing it.

I used to watch shows about magical girls when I was younger. If you've never seen those shows before, they're about girls with magic who use some kind of gem to change into cute battle outfits, have animal friends to mentor them, other magical friends to fight alongside...and love and justice always won out. I used to dream about what it would be like to become one, though I was sure it wasn't real.

And then, when I least expected it, it happened. I was heavily wounded after a car crash, and a cute animal appeared to me. He promised me any wish I wanted as long as I agreed to become a magical girl and fight witches who trap and kill humans. So I wished to keep living...and became what I am now.

I thought I was just a regular magical girl like the ones on TV. But it turns out I'm a lich. Revenant. Undead. He ripped my soul out of my body and put it in a gem...I know that's usually dark magic. I've been reassured that I'm safe for you all to be around, Rosetta helps keep my soul gem safe. But it just feels strange, that I've been like this for a while...is all. Any advice on living with it would be appreciated.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well that sure does sound... like a thing. Soldat remembers her from her from the mission, certainly, and there was nothing dark about her then. And, well, that also kind of sounds like them. Only they don't have a crystal, they have a lantern.

So they bake up some cookies in between working on meals, and hunt her down to offer her the platter to choose from. The shuttered lantern in question is still slung from a strap on their shoulder, in fact.

"I think I might be a lich, too," they say without any real preamble beyond the cookies. "I think that's okay."

Cookies. A tiny smile graces her face, though while she's been wondering just what's different about being a lich...does she actually need food? Something to ponder.

"You too? Were you...changed, like I was?"

"I died," Soldat explains. "Got my. Life essence or something. Sucked into another world. And then into this." They slide their lantern off their shoulder. It looks like it belongs in Europe in one of the world wars, except it's got metal shutters welded to it, to block the light and protect the glass.

Mami watches the lantern with interest, glancing back down at her gem. Soft little yellow egg, glowing. It's weird to think that her soul is in there.

But she looks back up at Soldat. "It's...good to know we're not alone in dealing with this," she says softly. "And thank you again for all your help back there. You're a baker too?"

"More of a cook, really. I'm told they're different things. But there's a few things I can bake okay." They set the platter down next to her on the greenhouse bench, sneaking one of the cookies themselves and dropping to a crouch, below her eye level so he's not leaning over her, to eat it.

"I didn't want you to think you're bad just because someone did something bad to you," they add after a beat, voice a little softer. "Especially not something I know a lot of good people had done to them, too." Everyone in Beacon had the same lantern situation, after all. They were all like her. And they were some of the best people Soldat has ever known.

Mami carefully takes one, rolling the cookie between her fingers. She nibbles at it---it is good! That's not her fear. It's the strangeness of not being an ordinary human. She smiles a little, to let Soldat know they taste good.

"It happens a lot? I don't think you know a lot of magical girls. Who else does this?"

Given the statements over the intercom, that doesn't seem like the case, kiddo. "Nah, not magical girls. Just. Everyone at the last place I was at is like me. Dead, but only alive because of our lanterns holding our life force. Or soul, I guess you might say." They're still not entirely sure if they even have a proper soul, but when dealing with magical girls, probably best to use their words.

The cookies are snickerdoodles. Sugar cookies with cinnamon topping. Simple, but tasty.

Mami listens patiently, and the strange fog that had overtaken her thoughts starts to lift. She looks again at the lantern, then at Soldat...then at the cookie. Another nibble. It's nostalgic, and reminds her of the love for life she still has.

"Hm...all of you? What was that place like?"

"Dark," Soldat says. "The whole world was dead. Most of the people there were spirits, not-- like us, with the lanterns, the actual dead. They didn't look human. Many of them were friendly, once we proved ourselves. Some of them weren't."

"A whole realm of the dead..."

She quietly imagines what that must be like. "Was it like a purgatory? If you're familiar with that word for it."

"Nah. Wasn't an afterworld, really. It was a world that was dying. And all the people on it were trapped until it finished dying, or it was saved." They finish their own cookie, and run metal fingers over the handle to their lantern. "Those of us who weren't natives, who got the lantern treatment. We were pulled there to try and help."

"Oh...new lights..."

Mami tries her best to imagine it. It must have been so hard for them. To have that thrust upon them, then to get to work...sounded like they didn't even get anything in exchange, like she had.

"It's not an easy burden. But thank you for sharing with me."

"Just don't want you feel bad," they reiterate. "You're not going to hurt us just cuz you rely on that to live." They nod at her gem. "It's about what you want to do with your life now that you've got it again. Yeah?"

"You're right. I'll hold onto that...and be here with you."

Mami smiles at them gratefully. "I couldn't ask for better company than everyone I've met here. Thank you, Soldat."

"There's good people here," Soldat agrees, looking away from the smile almost shyly, and outwards, as if over the rest of the train. "And you're very welcome. You let me know if you ever start feelin' worried about this again, okay?"

who am i: jelly 17 (cw: mentions of death/identity/spoilers)

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