who am i: jelly 17 (cw: mentions of death/identity/spoilers)

[magicurls]

[ Scene: Mami in the greenhouse, with a fluffy leaf-green hedgehog on her shoulder. ]

Hi everyone...

I wanted to let you know about something more serious. It's about who...or what I am. So this doesn't surprise you later. I guess some of you already knew I wasn't quite what I appeared to be, but I'm still processing it.



I used to watch shows about magical girls when I was younger. If you've never seen those shows before, they're about girls with magic who use some kind of gem to change into cute battle outfits, have animal friends to mentor them, other magical friends to fight alongside...and love and justice always won out. I used to dream about what it would be like to become one, though I was sure it wasn't real.

And then, when I least expected it, it happened. I was heavily wounded after a car crash, and a cute animal appeared to me. He promised me any wish I wanted as long as I agreed to become a magical girl and fight witches who trap and kill humans. So I wished to keep living...and became what I am now.

I thought I was just a regular magical girl like the ones on TV. But it turns out I'm a lich. Revenant. Undead. He ripped my soul out of my body and put it in a gem...I know that's usually dark magic. I've been reassured that I'm safe for you all to be around, Rosetta helps keep my soul gem safe. But it just feels strange, that I've been like this for a while...is all. Any advice on living with it would be appreciated.

Comments

Video

[thawed_pride]

It may have been dark magic that created you, but the notion that darkness is suited only for evil ends is a misconception. I am an incomplete being as well, though it was my heart excised from my body, rather than my soul.

[He taps his chest, right where his literal heart would be.]

The important thing is to remain true to yourself. Even if the dark magic has left a mark on your soul, don't allow it to define you, but don't fear it, either. Fearing something grants it power over your heart, which is where the danger truly lies.

Re: Video

[magicurls]

I think you're right about that. I want to stay strong and keep fighting for everyone.

But no matter what we're missing...we exist and we have a mission, right?

[thawed_pride]

That is correct. One need not be complete to accomplish great things, they must simply cleave to their ideals and press forward. And regardless, you don't seem as though your soul has been completely disconnected from your self, so it oughtn't matter much if it resides within your body, or within an object that communicates your will to your body.

[magicurls]

As long as it doesn't...well, glitch. I'll be all right.

[ She is relieved. ]

You know so much about these things. It's good to have guidance.

[thawed_pride]

I've seen others make a variety of mistakes in handling a similar issue. It is regrettable that my experiences are relevant, particularly to one so young, but at least some good is coming of it.

[magicurls]

What variety of mistakes? Should I be worried about something?

[thawed_pride]

Some of us too eagerly embraced the darkness which made us into what we are. Others lost sight of who we were, as we Nobodies begin our tenuous pseudo-existences devoid of feelings...it becomes far too easy to follow our cruelest whims, lacking the ability to regret our actions. Still others became so desperate to reclaim what we had lost as to harm countless others in pursuit of that goal.

Only the first seems potentially a problem, in your circumstance. But darkness need not be a problem in and of itself, so long as you don't allow it to overwhelm you.

[magicurls]

If darkness overwhelms me, I'll fade away.

{ Actually it's worse than that! But she doesn't know, thankfully. ]

I have to hold on to some light if I want to stay here. And I think I do.