voidtreckernet | Video

Entry tags:

Video | Day 29

[ Peter doesn't look nearly as energetic today and it's way earlier than he's usually seen as it's probably not much of a secret that he sleeps late. Really late. ]

Hey everyone-so I have a quick little PSA for you all and then I'm gonna go back to trying ta sleep I guess. Maybe it'll work out better. Um... anyways uh... I tried not to let it get to me buuuuut it did. So yeah-

Don't ever, ever say that what someone went through doesn't matter. It just makes you look like a jerk. It doesn't matter if you know what they've gone through or not-don't say it.

It does matter to them and you have no idea why or how much it mattered. So yeah, just don't say it.

that's all I have. I'm going to bed. 'Night.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Who said what and when?

[ He lets her curl onto the almost impossibly small bed with him and twists to face her, a little ashamed that he let it get to him so much. ]

I shouldn't have let it-just... When Mr stark said that Edge didn't know what I've been through he said that it didn't matter because everyone's been through stuff and I know that-he's right but at the same time-without like... trying to like make a contest of it he has no right to say that because what I went through-a lot of it was pretty bad. But I also know that I-that other people have it worse than I do and I'm not saying that I had it worse because it's just not a contest but I feel like if I argue then I'm making it contest.

[A nod. He was slowly figuring this odd thing out.] "Especially never say it to a woman you happen to be courting. By treating what someone cares about as if it matters, you are treating the person you are talking to as if they matter. Uncle Saetan drilled that lesson into our heads before any of us boyos could misstep too terribly, thankfully."

No.

No Especially. It is a blanket thing-don't say it to anyone. Period. Male, Female, intersex, non-binary, trans-don't say it. It's not cool.

"I was agreeing with you..." [Mother Night this kid was touchy.]

[ Gwen curls up with him as best as the small bed can allow. It help greatly that she’s already, so it’s not too difficult. ]

No one has any right to diminish what you’ve been through, even without knowing the story. I’m sorry he did that. And I don’t think you’re making this a contest but I’m also not Dge. His problem is he lacks a lot. One of the things he lacks is compassion. Another is empathy. If it didn’t happen to him, it’s irrelevant.

[Noct doesn't know Peter yet, but he is seriously sorry for him.]

What a shitty thing to say. I'm sorry if that was said to you.

Seconding what Peter said.

There is no ‘especially’ in this situation.There is never an especially in this situation. Regardless of your relationship to a person, or what that person identifies as, you never diminish another persons experiences by telling them what they’ve been through doesn’t matter. It’s a lack of respect. Courting or no, male or female or non-binary or trans or intersex, you don’t say that. It’s disrespectful.

The very fact that another being is breathing should be the only thing to remember.

Not to me, about me. But it was said where I could hear it so how different is it, really?

It's not different at all. As someone who was often the topic of "secret conversations", I sympathize with you on that front as well.

We all process trauma our own ways. I know we don't know each other all that well but, hey, if you need an ear, I'm a pretty good listener.

Thanks Eves, I was really struggling to think of how to respond to that without sounding like 'but the men!' and I mean, nobody wants that.

Don’t worry, Peter. I’ve got your back.

And I think you’d have managed it pretty well. I just hate hearing people sound like they’re saying women should be treated differently. I don’t care for being an ‘especially’ like that.

Thanks. Sorry you have to put up with that kinda thing too.

I'm Peter by the way, Peter Parker.

That or we don't process it at all and it keeps up for years and you get a shiny platinum membership to club insomnia.

...

I'm sorry, it's really nice of you to offer but I think more than anything right now, I just need sleep.

[So no a conversation he wanted to have with a female. This thing was public? He did not know that. He sighed and considered his words carefully.]

"Lady," [he began respectfully.] I would not wish to harm anyone's feelings or make them feel less. Accidentally upsetting another male however is easier to fix, the hurt feelings soothed. Upsetting a woman has other connected issues however. In addition to not wanting to hurt your feelings for the sake of not wanting to hurt your feelings, there is also the consideration that where I come from, at the least, there is an expectation that males serve and protect, so the insult, unintentional or not, is compounded if a male harms a female that way. Especially if it is a female is is courting and thus by the laws of Protocol is responsible in a great many ways. It is as though we were to compare tripping over someone while in bare feet and a dressing robe to falling over them while in heavy gear and carrying a sword. It is not that a male is any less deserving of consideration, it is that it is far easier to do more harm when it crosses gender lines. I suspect that he had the same conversation with the ladies about specially males. As for it being someone you are courting, on top of how easy it is to do that much more damage it is also a time when that much damage could break a bond that is forming, and destroy any hope the two of you share for the future."

"And additionally, if you don't mind my saying, I am a lot less afraid of what he could do to me if he was hurt enough to retaliate than what a female can do to me. Your tempers, Lady, are far more dangerous than ours." [A comment which had the benefit of being true while would also have the effect of making pretty much every woman he knew have to fight the urge to smile.]

"I was raised as I was raised. I will not appologize for being protective over the women in my life. I would sooner appologize for being born male."

It's just one of the "perks" of being a prince. But thanks.

Noctis. You can just call me Noct.

The experiences a person has in life, good or bad, shape you. Someone can deny it all they want, but it’s true. Try telling their experience doesn’t matter to someone who almost drowned as a kid and now have a fear of water. Or were bitten by some animal and now feel uncomfortable around that animal. Or someone who has PTSD from something terrible. Sorry to say it to whoever said that about you. [ Except he isn’t at all sorry and is baffled that anyone would be that ignorant. ] But that’s definitely a sign that someone’s experiences absolutely matter.

Edited 2020-04-30 02:35 (UTC)

[ He nods in agreement and curls around her so his head is resting on her shoulder. ]

I'm like this close to like recruiting you to kick his ass just to teach him we fight each other's battles.

[ He yawns and closes his eyes as he holds her. ]

You're a nice pillow...

Yeah-yeah. Women just aren't the damsels in distress that society has painted them into? So there's no need to treat them like they might break-I think they're a hell of a lot tougher than men honestly because of all the shit they have to put up with-

[ Whoops. ]

Sorry, stuff.

Well, insomnia's not great, but probably the least awful of coping mechanisms.

Door's open whenever you've got some time. I don't think there's much you could surprise me with, plus, having an unbiased onlooker? Kinda like a therapist?

..We don't actually have one of those on board, do we?

Never mind. Get some sleep. Hopefully tomorrow looks a little better.

[ Each time he calls her lady, her expression sours some. She’s not fond of it at all and will address it in a moment. It still seems like he’s entirely missing her point. ]

Your upbringing being what it is, don’t call me lady. It may be a sign of respect where you’re from, but I don’t know you and am not comfortable with it. You don’t know me well enough to know what my tempers are, and since I’m not from your universe, feel free to assume I’m not the same as the women you’re used to, shall we?

He was speaking about people in general. It wasn’t the place to bring up courting advice since he wasn’t asking for it.

I'll probably regret this, but I'm going to try to explain it as calmly and patiently as I can.

You left out the context. The situation was that one person was defending another's behavior by invoking what they'd been through. Saying those events don't matter, in this case, means that it isn't an excuse for the behavior. Nothing more.

Let me give you an example. A man stabs a woman. Bad behavior, right? Does it matter that the woman reminds him of an old lover who betrayed him? Does it matter that he was trained to kill from a young age? No. The woman's still stabbed. The act was still wrong. What the guy had been through doesn't matter.

A man betrays his best friend. But that man has secretly been jealous of his best friend and in love with that friend's wife. Does that make the betrayal okay? Does his pain and jealousy excuse it? It does not. The act is still wrong.

You see a man preparing to hurl a wall of flames into a town. Do you stop to ask his history? When he says, "You have no idea what I've been through," do you back off and let him do it?

Whatever pain people have, whatever they've endured, it doesn't change the nature of right and wrong. They still make their choices. They can succumb, or they can grow. So yes, those events matter to them on a personal level. But when it comes to what they do... no. They don't matter. What matters is the choices you make.

That man from the second example. I asked why we should let him back. What if he was weak enough to succumb to that influence again? What would we do when the evil we fought claims his heart again?

He didn't say it wouldn't happen. He didn't say we should understand his pain, or sympathize with him, or forgive him, or even try to restore his heart again. His answer was simply, "Kill me without a second thought."

He made his choice, to die before causing anyone any more harm. And that was when I could rest assured that he was on our side to stay, and trust him with my life in battle.

Nice to meet you, Noct. I'd be more enthusiastic but I'm running on like... no sleep.

But uh, you can feel free to call me Pete, and when I wake up-if I get to sleep-catch me in the game room or something.

He’s not worth it.

[ She smiles and wraps an arm around him, hugging him briefly and planting a kiss on top of his head. ]

He’s just...sad. I don’t know. I feel like I’d be kicking a small, angry street cat if you recruited me to fight him. It just seems wrong.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Page 1 of 5

Video | Day 29

Action wherever Peter is:

his bed, hopefully Aunt May doesn't walk in

no subject

no subject

no subject

they'd hear her coming but. yeah.

Video

no subject

Video

Re: Video

no subject

no subject

no subject

: Video

no subject

no subject

Re: : Video

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

Video

no subject