voidtreckernet

[ Thankfully Jiang Cheng wasn’t necessarily expecting a reply, especially since she’d said she was coming over pretty much immediately. It means he can lean down and tend to his huge rabbit a little, try and figure out what the best thing to do might be. They’re different from dogs, after all.

When Madoka appears he’s about to call out and greet her when her small arms latch around his waist, leaving him baffled with a rush of confusion he can’t quite put words to. Nothing about it upsets him, and there’s no discomfort — instead he’s filled with a sense of belonging, of contentment, the same sort of thing he feels when a-Ling slams into him and demands affection.

It’s a little overwhelming.

After taking a moment to breathe, to let his emotions rush through him - and to try and make sure his empathy doesn’t betray him completely - he lets his arms wrap around her in return, albeit a little awkwardly. He’s not the best at this, even now. ]

I’m happy to see you as well. She’s right here.

[ She can take the awkwardness, at least. It seems like it suits Jiang Cheng, after all. Someone who usually looks and acts so confident, but can get a little worried about the softer, more emotional parts of life. As long as it's not an outright rejection, Madoka will feel like she did good with this hug.

(And maybe just a little bit of the feeling of contentment leaks through to her in the embrace, bringing her to smile when she pulls her head back to look up at him.) ]

Oh?

[ That makes Madoka fully pull out of the hug though, since it's hard to see the rabbit otherwise. But when she does see the animal, she looks even happier. ]

Wow.. You were right, she really is big! But she still looks like such a cute rabbit..! I bet holding a big rabbit like that is super nice! [ Because there's just more fluff to hug. Clearly this is the best logic possible. ]

[ It's still difficult for Jiang Cheng to muster himself, to manage himself, to let his emotions settle rather than swallow him whole. He's felt everything so keenly for his entire life, felt the pain of it of alone for such a long time that he has no other knowledge of how to deal with it. Empathy is given him a new purpose, at least; the kind to stop himself from falling into pieces.

Leaning back, he tries not to let on just how overwhelmed he is by... Everything here. The relationships he has built, the friendships, the joy, all tied up with the sadness and pain. ]

You can hold her if you want.

[ Jiang Cheng leans away and turns back to look at the giant rabbit. Of course Wei Wuxian would pick such a cumbersome pet for him, just because of the dog issue. ]

Though you might want to sit down.

.. you think I could?

[ Apparently Madoka doubts she'll be able to contain a pet that big even while sitting down. But she also knows Jiang Cheng wouldn't just suggest it if he thought it was a bad idea, so the girl figures she can at least give it a try.

Hence why she does sit down, though she's staring at the big creature.. How is she going to lift that onto her lap? Can she even do that?

That part is a little more dubious, so instead Madoka turns her big puppy eyes in the man's direction. A-A little help? ]

Of course.

[ It's not as if Jiang Cheng is going to let her get flattened by his new pet. He's not quite that heartless, and it shows in the way that he moves to go and get the rabbit out of her makeshift hutch.

Another thing he and Wei Wuxian have done together. It's a little overwhelming, there's no denying it.

Slowly, he lifts the giant thing into his arms and reaches to, carefully, place her in Madoka's lap. He also hovers, just a little, to make sure she's alright. ]

There.

[ Don't worry, Madoka is determined to make sure that this doesn't end up like some circus act worthy situation, where the two of them end up chasing an oversized rabbit around a carriage for ten minutes.

Which means that she's making sure to move and put her arms over the rabbit - she's relatively petite enough that it's honestly not a burden on a rabbit of this size - so it can't just decides to run away.

Or so she hopes.

And once she's sure it's just sitting there, Madoka finally gives herself some time to actually admire the rabbit and the way it's sitting on her lap. ]

Wow, it's kind of heavy, isn't it..? [ Heavier than she expected! ] I wonder why mister Wei Wuxian would give you such a big one..

[ There's a pause. For a moment it's like Madoka realises something, as some tiny bit of his feelings might be slipping out after all, thanks to the empathy. ]

.. you seem happy with it though.

[ When he's sure she's settled he leans back, letting her take most of the weight of the giant thing before he breathes out a noise.

He knows why the rabbit is big, but he's not ready to talk about it. Instead, he rolls his eyes and tries to play it off, as he does most things - because that way he doesn't have to dwell too hard or too long on something that makes his chest ache.

At least seeing Madoka with her makes him smile. ]

Because he wants to be as annoying as possible at all times. He's stupid.

[ But at least it's said with some kind of fond exasperation rather than real hatred. ]

... But she's a good pet so far.

She's really cute! [ Madoka pipes up.

Perhaps even a bit too happily, but.. come on. How can the other girl not be happy like this, while she's sitting here with this huge fluffy rabbit on her lap, and with someone she's really fond of right there as well? There's no way that combination wouldn't put a smile on her face. ]

You know.. since she's so big and fluffy, I bet she would be really good for people to hug when they're sad!

[ At the very least that isn't directly aimed at Jiang Cheng as a hint.. Madoka just means it in general.

But hey, that doesn't mean that he can't hug it if he's sad. ]

[ Jiang Cheng doesn't comment on that because, mostly, his initial reaction had just been that she was large. That she was a giant rabbit who was overwhelming because of what she meant and the purpose of the gift itself. Adjusting to that had taken enough time.

But at least Madoka is happy, and that settles him. The rabbit seems content to be petted, to lift her head up and twitch her ears, idle and calm. ]

I suppose so.

[ Not that she's implying anything, right? He huffs. ]

You can come here whenever you want to, then. You don't have to ask.

[ Madoka will gratefully make use of this opportunity. Both of the one Jiang Cheng is offering her, but also her current opportunity give the rabbit some really nice and soft pets.

It's so soothing.

Maybe that's what makes the girl smile as she looks back up at the man. ]

That's okay. I already know you don't mind me coming to find you at any time. [ So she figures this would be the same. ] .. right?

[ His immediate response, at least instinctively, is to make some kind of comment about her being stupid, to scoff, to shrug it off, but he bites his tongue.

Jiang Cheng is trying, and years and years of isolation and pain haven't made it much easier. The knowledge of trying to be better, of working with Wei Wuxian and trying to improve what they have together. Completing missions, talking, using their words - it's hard.

But he is trying.

Instead, he looks away, lips pursed for a moment before he speaks. ]

That's right. I don't mind.

[ Perhaps it'd mean even more if Madoka had the faintest idea of just how much effort goes into him even saying relatively small things like this.

But even though she doesn't know the exact extent of his uphill struggle, she does know that it's at least harder for Jiang Cheng to say this stuff than it is for most people - so she smiles all the same, looking eternally grateful in that soft smile. ]

Thank you so much. Knowing that.. really makes me happy. It kind of feels like an honour, hehe.

[ Jiang Cheng isn't sure he would say she knows him well enough to judge, but he trusts her enough to at least understand his words and where they're coming from.

It's more trust than he offers other people to say the least.

Shaking his head he puts on a frown, crossing his arms. ]

If you say so. Just don't abuse it.

[ Not that she would. ]

Of course not..!

[ The words fly out of her mouth quickly, and she momentarily stops her petting of the giant rabbit on her lap.

(Sorry, rabbit. She's just way too busy being shocked at the mere idea of her ever doing that.) ]

I wouldn't ever want to hurt you.. or.. um, even annoy you.. So if you ever need me to go away, you just have to say it..! [ And then she will leave. Madoka is an obedient girl, after all. She'd never want to be a bother on someone else. ]

[ Jiang Cheng leans a little closer almost too quickly. ]

I know you wouldn't.

[ He looks down at the rabbit and hesitates, words on the tip of his tongue, before he forces himself to actually put to words the things that are going on in his head. ]

I was thinking of calling her Lili.

[ His saving grace is the fact that Madoka definitely doesn't notice that it's a little too quick. Instead she just goes quiet for a moment at the reassuring - like a slowly starting fire of at least slight insecurity is immediately put out by his actions.

And then that thought only turns into surprise when he suddenly switches the topic.

Though not in a bad way. The girl just doesn't see it coming. ]

Lili? [ ... ] That's a pretty name. Like a princess from a fairytale..

[ She pauses for a moment, as if realising something else, and then looks at Jiang Cheng while she speaks. ]

Did you think that one up yourself..?

[ He breathes out slowly, gently, before he turns down to look at her.

It's a bit too close to his heart, a bit close to his chest, and he swallows before he nods again. ]

It suits her. She will be treated like a princess.

[ Then, haltingly, hesitating - as if the words are too hard to speak - he lifts his head. ]

My sister was named Jiang Yanli.

[ His sister.

Who died.

Everything becomes clear very rapidly, and Madoka silently stares down at the rabbit on her lap again before she looks back at him. ]

I think.. she would probably be happy, knowing that she is being fondly remembered by you. [ Is that going a little too far? Madoka isn't sure, but.. she can't help it. It does bring an edge of caution to her tone, but she still means every word of what she's saying.

There's nothing more she wants to do than at least try to say something nice here, even if she knows that behind his words most likely lies a huge hole in Jiang Cheng's heart that can't be patched up so easily. ]

Especially when it involves such a cute, big bunny..

[ He's not going to put it into words, but Jiang Cheng is well aware that Madoka knows.

She knows more than a lot of people on this train, more than people from his own world, at least about his pain and grief and hurt, so he has to swallow it all back before he nods his head.

He would like to hope that Yanli would be happy to be remembered, but surely she would be happier being alive? Being recognised for all that she was in reality, not from what memories are left behind?

Swallowing, he reaches out and pets between the rabbit's ears. ]

I think so. She liked rabbits.

[ She had said that families should never be parted. It was almost painfully prophetic. ]

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