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[dredefulchilde]

[Several hours after his apparently miraculous resurrection, Joscelin Fitzthomas opens the video link. He looks shellshocked and confused. But he also looks different. Even as washed out as he is by the video feed, his face is not quite as pale as before, and there is actual color in his cheeks that make his freckles (which also suddenly seem more numerous than there had been) stand out even more.

When he speaks, his voice is quiet and subdued, with none of his usual sarcastic swagger.]

It would appear that I troubled many of you during the mission. For that, I am sorry.

Romeo and I caught a saboteur in the act, and that person reacted by shooting at us. I took the bullet—or bolt, I suppose; how does one classify science fiction weapons?—for Romeo. At any rate, I was under the impression that I had been wounded, but I have since been disabused of that notion and it now appears that I spent the last several days dead, somehow. Tony Stark had my ashes and personal effects in his room. I...

[He seems to realize he’s rambling and cuts himself off.]

Since then, Romeo has vanished.

[His voice breaks.]

I came to bundled away in a suitcase earlier today, so please—help me by checking the baggage car regularly. Maybe Romeo needs help extricating himself from a piece of luggage. Romeo is the very best of us and I beg you all to help me find him and keep him safe. Please.

Comments

[dredefulchilde]

[Joscelin is also rather confused about the wand the Doctor keeps waving at him. During the Void Flu epidemic, Joss had thought it was a kind of thermometer, since the Doctor had mentioned something about taking his temperature. Now he’s not so sure.]

Not squeamish at all; I’m quite used to the sight of blood. Speaking of which, I seem to be experiencing some sort of stomach upset. I tried drinking some blood two or three hours ago and immediately vomited it back up.

[He continues in this vein for a moment, giving the Doctor ample amounts of time to stick him with that needle.]

[usernamesarecool]

Mm...

[ He says conversationally before poking Joss's finger with the pin he'd pulled from the drawer while holding Joss's hand steady. ]

Well, that's probably because, as a rule.. humans don't tend to digest blood very well-or not straight anyways.

[dredefulchilde]

Ow!

[Joss tries to jerk his hand away from the Doctor but is unable to. Why is he so weak?]

I’m not a human, idiot. I haven’t been a human in 670 years. Are you quite certain you’re a doctor?

[usernamesarecool]

Positive.

[ He states, watching the little red dot surface from Joss's finger. That's a healthy blood flow if he's seen one. He quickly grabs a cotton swab and presses it against Joss's finger. ]

Didn't you notice your hands are warm? Your temperature is a healthy thirty-seven. You might not not have been a human in six hundred seventy years-but you haven't been a vampire in... well, my best guess is several hours now.

You said that you were marked, magically and you no longer have those marks. My Diagnosis? Welcome back to the human race.

[dredefulchilde]

[Joss doesn’t believe what he’s hearing. He glares at the Doctor and pulls his hand away, sucking on his finger. Once again, the coppery taste of blood fills his mouth and he finds himself gagging.]

You’re wrong! I can’t be human—that’s impossible. Vampires don’t change back. I died in 1349 and then I became a vampire and there’s no way to fix that.

[He’s shaking and hyperventilating now. Even if the conscious part of him refuses to believe what the Doctor is saying, the rest of him knows it to be true and the clashing emotions are throwing him into a panic attack. He starts wheezing.]

[usernamesarecool]

[ The Doctor just lets him take in the news but when he starts wheezing he quickly locates one of the inhalers in and offers it to him. ]

Use this, you'll feel better.

[dredefulchilde]

[Joscelin doesn’t know what the inhaler is or does, so he just holds it, confused, and continues to choke.]

Why should I believe you, anyway? You’re not human either. You have two hearts.

[usernamesarecool]

[ The Doctor figures out the issue quickly and grabs his hand to direct him how to hold it. ]

Well, no. But just because I'm not human doesn't mean I don't know about human medicine. That's like saying humans can't be doctors for cats or dogs because they're not cats or dogs.

[ He directs the inhaler to Joss's mouth. ]

Now, I'm going to press down at the top, you'll feel a small puff, suck it in and hold it for about a five seconds.

[dredefulchilde]

[Still mystified (and unable to argue with the inhaler in his mouth), Joss does as directed and is surprised when the tightness in his lungs begins to dissipate. He's less dizzy now that he's getting enough oxygen again.]

...What is this thing? And what are you? I've never heard of any creatures with two hearts.

[usernamesarecool]

It's an inhaler. Specifically, it was created to help those with asthma- the medicine it's self is Albuterol-it's designed to relax and open airways relieve the coughing and wheezing.

[ He explains, taking the inhaler back. ]

So, it should help for about twelve hours and that'll give me a good chance to work out an asthma plan for you.

And, I'm a Timelord-by your standards-I'm in alien. You've heard of aliens, right? Well I'm one of the nice ones. Usually. I try to be nice.

[dredefulchilde]

...I have asthma?

[That isn’t possible. Vampires don’t get asthma. But...unbidden, a hazy memory from nearly 700 years ago rises to the surface. He’d played too long in the hay and couldn’t breathe. One of the monks had fetched a bowl of hot water and forced him to breathe in the steam until the tightness in his lungs went away.

Oh, fuck.]

“Timelord” is a stupid name for an alien.

[Yes, Doctor, he’s sulking.]

[usernamesarecool]

[ Joss is a child and he's adapting to a pretty extreme change so he's allowed to be grumpy. ]

Well, I didn't choose it-but that's what we're called. What we were called-what I'm called. I just happen to be the last.

[ But he doesn't dwell on that and moves onto the next thing. ]

But yes, you have asthma and we'll sort that out-gonna take some medications-you'll need to take them in the morning and the evening. Will you be able to remember it all or should write it down?

and has there been anything else you've noticed that's different that you're used to? Anything at all?

[dredefulchilde]

[He’s still pouting but he takes in all the information from the Doctor quietly. He’ll have to talk to the Doctor later about all of this, once he’s had time to process.]

I can’t see as well. Up close is fine, but further away it gets fuzzy. And I can’t see in the dark anymore.

[usernamesarecool]

Well, most people can't see as well in the dark that's not much of a fault. The fuzziness though.. I'm going to step back and you let me know when I start to get fuzzy, yes?

[ He prompts, taking a two steps back. ]

[dredefulchilde]

[His answer is immediate:]

A little fuzzy.

[usernamesarecool]

Yeah.. okay. well.. I'm a bit limited with supplies but I can make it work. It's a medic car-probably don't have an eye chart-no harm in looking though.

Ever been to the Eye doctor Joss? Do you remember having worn glasses at all?

[ He starts pulling drawers open. ]

[dredefulchilde]

Eye doctors didn’t exist in the fourteenth century. I didn’t even know anyone who wore spectacles.

[usernamesarecool]

Ah, yes. I well.. I suppose that checks.

[ He mutters in response while rummaging through drawers. ]

Yowza! An Eye chart!

[ He exclaims, pulling it out. ]

Okay, we're going to do a test. I need you to cover your... right eye and red down the chart as you can see it-if it gets to blurry then stop and try not to squint-lots of people have a hard time with that one.

[dredefulchilde]

[He does fine with the chart until the fourth line.]

Er...L...D? No, P? B...C...

[It’s all a bit downhill from there.]

[usernamesarecool]

Okay.

[ The Doctor says, signaling for him to stop on that side. ]

Now, same thing but cover your left eyes-sorry. eye. You only have two.

[dredefulchilde]

[The left eye is a bit stronger than the right, but only barely. He makes it through the fourth line, but the fifth proves too much and he quits halfway through the row, frustrated with his inability to see.]

This is so stupid!

[usernamesarecool]

Yeah, I know-it's boring. Why I'm the Doctor and not the Eye Doctor-actually that's not it at all.

[ He rambles as he looks around for some supplies. ]

Okay-so we need to get you on medications for asthma and a lovely new pair of glasses-gives me something to do, I suppose.

So, you did a great job, I'll get you some candy. Really wishing they had ice lollies but they can't give me everything.

[ He puts the chart down and offers a hand out to Joss to help him hop down. ]

[dredefulchilde]

[If Joss had felt shellshocked before, it’s nothing compared to what he’s feeling now. He’s human. Not only that—he’s a particularly weak human child with bad lungs and poor eyesight. If he still believed in God he’d be cursing the deity right now. Before, he’d been several times stronger than the average adult, and faster than any Olympic sprinter. Now he’s just a stupid little kid who can’t even see particularly well.

He allows himself to be helped off the counter, still glaring daggers at the Doctor, as if this is his fault and not a massive cosmic joke.

Then he remembers that the woman is still there, in the room with them.]

I want a second opinion.

[He points at Wen Qing.]

You. You’re a human. Tell me if he’s lying to me about all this.

[radishlobbyist]

[ She had been watching the whole procedure attentively while still doing to appear like she wasn't watching. She still didn't understand how the device worked but at least the rest of the exam had been more familiar. She had only been tempted to interfere once, when the boy had suffered a panic attack, but the two-hearted physician - two hearts?! - had had it well in hand every step of the way.

This Doctor is certainly a lot nicer with difficult patients than she is, though she does try to have a better bedside manner with children - except when they're being brats on purpose, anyway.

Now when the boy remembers her, she deliberately takes her time to put down her pharmacology notes before stepping towards him. ]

It isn't a matter of me being human that makes me more qualified. But I am trained in treating humans. We will start with a pulse diagnosis, then I would like to give you a physical exam and more in-depth examination of your qi. It will be non-invasive. We should not only be concerned with you being human but also with detecting possible ill effects of your... revival and your transformation, and whether there are signs of it being temporary. There may be more surprises than just your trouble breathing.

[ Because in truth, while she is willing to indulge his desire for a second opinion, it's pretty obvious that he is alive in every sense of the word even from just having observed the Doctor's exam. ]

[usernamesarecool]

[ Really? A second opinion? The Doctor doesn't say anything but when he steps away to let Wen Qing step over to give her opinion he's maybe just a tad huffy about it. His diagnosis is spot on! The Sonic said so. ]

Oh come on, people coming back to life is hardly the oddest thing I've seen-would like to know how it's done though. [ He shrugs. ]

But then, that's probably what did it-turned you human, I mean. This is all a bit of a gray area because strictly speaking, my universe doesn't have vampires-that've found. Just big fish that sort of act like them-but anyway! As a vampire your not exactly alive but you're not dead either-you're considered undead so when you died.. all the way.

You don't come back undead you come back fully human. It makes sense, in a way.

[ Or at least it does to him. Anyone else? ]

[ no? ]