Video | Llama 1

[firewalled]

[Rich, as per usual, is in the music car, once all the excitement of the platform is over and done, His guitar is sitting in his lap, and he looks a little tired, but there's at least a small smile on his face.]

Yo. Rich here. So I thought I'd better get this out of the way, but if you've had to deal with me being a mega asshole in the last month, I'm sorry.

[He looks properly ashamed, and has to take a minute to run his hand through his hair.]

Ugh. I don't even know what to say about it. Basically, I wasn't in control of myself, and then when I was back to myself, I guess I kinda crashed super hard. You know, dopamine machine broke and all.

...If you wanna talk to me about that, or about anything, I guess, come and find me. I'm not gonna try to run away this time.

[Rich exhales slowly then, and then hoists his guitar up with a much brighter grin. It might look a tad ingenuine, but Rich is an expert at faking it until he makes it.]

Anyways, I've still been really into practicing my music and all, and I was kinda wondering if someone would wanna do a concert again? But instead of me just flying solo, we could all do our own sets of a couple songs? Hell, maybe some of us can start up bands, I've been wanting to do that for ages. If you wanna jam, hit me up!

Comments

[yondu]

[He's exuding big Shotgun Daddy energy completely unintentionally.]

Where can I find ya?

[firewalled]

I'm uh, still in the music room. If I'm not there, I'm probably in the dining car, but I'm still practicing for a couple hours...

[Please don't kill him, weird blue dad!]

[yondu]

[And Yondu turns off the ICP and he's off to go find Rich! Sorry buddy.]

[He makes his way to the music car and comes striding on in. Being in the Ravager uniform means he's got the added effect of 'space biker' on him while he's making his way over to the practice area.]

Hey, Rich. You know a girl named Cherry?

[Because Yondu knows a girl named Cherry.]

She said somethin' went down back on Erda. Now, you're sayin' you weren't in full control of your emotions, huh?

[firewalled]

[Oh geez. Rich is already extremely uncomfortable with how this conversation is going. He shifts the guitar in his lap, looking up at the man and trying not to look as tense as he feels. That fails, though, at the mention of someone he hasn't seen in a while.]

Cherry? ...Right, back on that mission. I was... really out of it.

[That's the understatement of the century.]

I'm r-really sorry. It's true that I wasn't in control of myself, though. I never would have said anything that cruel to her if I had...

[yondu]

Well, it was still botherin' her over in mushroom land. At the time I told her that mission was rough on people an' you was likely speakin' out of turn an' she should try talkin' to ya again. But if you ain't talked yet, ya oughta go to her instead of waitin' on her to come to you.

[He thumbs loosely towards the door, in the direction of the sleepers, even if he doesn't mean exactly going and finding her now.]

I guarantee she'd wanna be there if you told her what was happenin'.

[firewalled]

You're right... I didn't really get out of that for a while, and when I did I was... kind of pushing people away. She probably would've gotten it rough if I found her.

[He sighs quietly.]

I know I should go. It's just... hard.

[There's a part of him that's sure he'll screw up again, and that piece believes if he keeps thinking that, it'll be a self-fulfilling prophecy.]

[yondu]

You think not goin's gonna stop you from kickin' the shit out of yourself for makin' errors? [Yondu truly knows better on that one, unless Rich is genuinely some kinda psycho.] You know what's hard? Knowin' you messed with someone what not deserved it.

Why the hell did you do it nohow?

[firewalled]

No, of course not. I just... thought it would save her from feeling shitty too. I don't want to screw things up for her. I feel awful about what happened, I...

[He sighs and grits his teeth.]

I was being controlled by someone else. They got into my head using some tech that was installed in there before I came here, and then locked me away so I couldn't use my own body.

...When she saw me, she was worried. But they made me snap at her.

[yondu]

Who or what the hell would make you snap at Cherry? She wouldn't have a bad intention in her?

[He hooks his thumbs in his belt, though, giving Rich an earnest look.]

Y'ain't makin' it easier on her. Now she's just wonderin' what she did wrong. I can confirm y'ain't gettin' what you want outa sayin' nothin' outside of hidin'. Now if you tell her it weren't your fault, she'll listen.

[firewalled]

...There's a supercomputer in my head. It's, uh, supposed to help me with whatever my goals are, but it has really extreme methods of getting its way. It usually makes me act like an asshole when it's on.

[He has no good way of explaining why it was on, and he hopes Yondu doesn't push on that.]

I know I should tell her that. I know she'll believe me... just nervous, I guess.

[yondu]

...Then why'd you turn it on for?

[It's a natural question because it doesn't make any sense. But he still moves on to add.]

Don't make that girl come to you. She's been lonely an' homesick an' there's a big ol' difference between beggin' someone to still want you around an' just havin' that someone tellin' ya outright they'd like to have ya.

[firewalled]

I won't make her come to me. I... listen. It's complicated, and all you need to know is that I'll go to find her soon.

[He grits his teeth for a moment, against a wave of anger.]

I get that you're just looking out for someone you care about, but you can't understand what happened to me, so I don't appreciate the assumptions that I'm setting out to hurt her just by sitting here.

[yondu]

Not assumin' that. I told her that you probably was too stressed out to come talk to her when she was sad, an' she's been countin' on it.

I'm just sayin'... [and he sounds sad about that, that he desperately doesn't want Cherry's kindness and patience taken for granted because there are so few of those people in this world. It's true, he doesn't know Rich from the man in the moon. But he knows Cherry.]

[But Cherry wouldn't appreciate him goin' too rough on her friend.]

I'm just sayin' that it'd mean the world to her.

[He doesn't ask what happened again. There's enough scarred up folks on the train that he decides to not- as he'd phrased it to Cherry herself in, kick in the glass shards that are a bad experience any further.]

[firewalled]

Stressed is a good word for it.

[Miserable might have been closer to the truth, but he understands Yondu didn't see the worst of him, when he was out by the river. He sighs and rubs a hand through his hair.]

You seriously think she's willing to give me another shot? She wouldn't be better off with me out of the pictures?

[There are so many other people who are better than him. People who can be better friends to someone as sweet as Cherry.]

I don't deserve a friend like her.

[yondu]

[You know what one of the absolute worst states of being is? Saying something to someone else that you wish someone had at one time said to you when you needed to hear it. It's like feeling a tragedy tumble out of your mouth.]

Ain't a matter of nobody deservin' nothin'. I think you make her happy an' she misses ya. Her picture's better with you in it. I reckon a man that can apologize to someone what he loves is twice the man that can win any kind of fight.

[Maybe he wouldn't have lost everyone he loved if he'd not been so damn worried about looking weak.]

[firewalled]

...Well, I'm sure not winning any fights lately.

[It's hard to manage that, when he isn't fighting against normal teenagers anymore. Maybe fighting back against Jack was some sort of win, but considering all the help he had, he can't take credit for that.]

I miss her too, though. She really was nice to me. Made me feel like a better person.

[yondu]

Well uh.... You're really lucky. 'Cause she's waitin' an' is real sure you're that kinda person.

[Which is better than some of them get. He doesn't know. Maybe he can do Cherry this favor and this kid one, too.]

[firewalled]

...Guess I am. I'll check in on her tonight, hopefully.

[He shifts in place, turning his focus away from Yondu and back towards his guitar. He's a little unsure if Yondu still wants to hang around, or if he just wanted to give him a little grilling.]