01 - The Jelly Incident

[marvelous_murderbot]

[The camera comes on to Guri who looks...completely normal, sitting there. But mildly off-put.]

It appears that the first unusual incident has already happened - fortunately enough, I was never a child or adolescent, so I have been spared that, however there are certain aggravating effects nonetheless.

So since I will retain this form, if anybody is in need of an adult to help watch over the children, I can certainly...

[Her hair seems to move.]

Oh, bother

[And a mass of golden hair suddenly appears, erupting outwards like a Christmas tree being cut from its wrapping, covering her face and dropping all the way to her waist. There is a moment of pause, tapping her hand on her knee before parting the hair.]

My hair does grow, so it keeps coming back. All of it.

Comments

[onehandsomeslickninja]

As much as you're comfortable with, without it compromising your abilities! [Whatever they are. He assumes fighting is one of them.]

I'm interested in that story if you want to tell it though.

[marvelous_murderbot]

[A mass of it is tossed back with some effort so she can properly see.]

I usually keep it to just below shoulder length, really. I like it, aesthetically. But it does not impede functionality.

And where would you like me to begin?

[onehandsomeslickninja]

Well, if you didn't come out the, uh, natural way, how DID it happen?

[Edge has no idea what is offensive in this situation, so he's blindly muddling through.]

[marvelous_murderbot]

[Well that makes sense, as neither does she, really.]

I am what is termed a Human Replica Droid. My hair, my skin - those are organic, grown. My organs, too, though they were created synthetically. But my skeleton is metallic, my senses enhanced with various sensors. And I have an AA-1 Verbobrain, modeled to operate much as the human brain does.

[She leaves unsaid the musculature.]

[onehandsomeslickninja]

[Okay, he hadn't been expecting that, and it takes him some time to figure out how it works. So she's basically human but with metal instead of normal bones, as he understands it...]

Okay, I think I get it! It sounds like all this is the really advanced technology that we didn't have and I don't understand, but clearly the end result is pretty amazing!

[marvelous_murderbot]

[It's a start, at any rate.]

Well, thank you. Many people would consider me a glorified toaster, so I appreciate the sentiment.

[onehandsomeslickninja]

Really? Why?

[That doesn't make any sense to him. Is it just because she was made? But then why make her as a person if they didn't want her to be a person?]

[marvelous_murderbot]

Many people view artificial life forms, like me, as lesser tools. Not worthy of full respect, and certainly not warranting self-autonomy.

[onehandsomeslickninja]

You're alive, thinking, feeling. Why is that artificial just because some of your parts are different?

[No, he understands the prejudice; the question is rhetorical, accompanied as it is by his eyebrows lowering.]

[marvelous_murderbot]

Again, kind of you.

[She inclines her head in acknowledgement. Or what can be seen of it.]

[onehandsomeslickninja]

It's not kind. It's basic human decency! People who can't do such a simple thing don't deserve to be called people!

[marvelous_murderbot]

[She takes that on board, quietly. It's a rare sentiment, where she's from. Then again, when you have a galaxy worth of droids doing every task you want for no pay...]

They are still people. Unfortunately just regular ones, where I'm from.

[onehandsomeslickninja]

Hey, if they get to say you're not people for such a dumb reason, then I think we can say they're not people for a much better reason!

[marvelous_murderbot]

[She considered that for a long moment, rubbing her chin in thought.]

No. No, I do not think I could. Doing it to me does not justify me returning the disfavor, as it were.

[onehandsomeslickninja]

It's not the same at all. Denying that someone is a person is reprehensible. Where I come from, one Lunarian wanted to exterminate all of us because he felt his people were important and we down on the planet were like ants. That's the sort of thinking that leads to cruelty and despair, and it needs to be stopped.

[marvelous_murderbot]

I can agree that it should be stopped - but not, I think, by my descending to the same level to retaliate in kind.

Of course, in the example of your Lunarian - such an interesting name - stopping such active measures would be imperative.

[She shrugs.]

My life was defined by causing intimidation and dread. Free of that programming, I prefer to not indulge in negative outcomes unless I have to.

[onehandsomeslickninja]

Oh, one of our party was like that. But he switched to fighting for a righteous cause, using white magic and strength instead of the blade of darkness. Still, if he becomes anything less than a peaceful and wise king who avoids war and battle, I'll eat my mask!

[marvelous_murderbot]

All of those terms are strange to me - but if I may: why would you eat your mask? I know it is an idiom, but it is one unknown to me..

[onehandsomeslickninja]

I wouldn't! That's why you say something like that, because the event is so impossible you'd never risk doing the action you promised.

[marvelous_murderbot]

Ah, I see.

I can handle idioms, but from outside my universe, I cannot guarantee understanding.

[onehandsomeslickninja]

Don't worry about it! People talk about stuff I don't understand all the time here, then look at me like I'm the crazy one when I mention magic or the Lunarians and the Red Moon. That's just what happens when people like us all get together.

[marvelous_murderbot]

Logical! Though I am interested in all of those things.

[onehandsomeslickninja]

Then perhaps when this whole ordeal is over, I could have the pleasure of your company for exchanging tales!

[marvelous_murderbot]

I would like that, very much. The sharing of tales is very interesting indeed.

[onehandsomeslickninja]

I'd like it too! The company of a beautiful woman is always a delight!