video

[sos_pilot]

[ The video is late at night - not too late to wake a bunch of people up, but it's definitely different than Della's usual videos where it's an earlier time. Not to mention she kinda... looks like hell. Bags under her eyes, all the usual signs of exhaustion - but it's more than that. She actually looks emotionally beat up. ]

... Hey, guys. I figured I owed a bunch of you an explanation about my behavior last mission. Look, I know a lot of the time I'm all "woo, adventure, let's beat up monsters, yeah!" everywhere we go, but last time I was more... out of control. Not listening to anyone, still trying to fight even when I was literally falling apart... and I am sorry. I shouldn't have to make you guys worry more than you already have to, especially in the middle of a dangerous fight.

... Here's the deal. All of you are amazing, you have to know that on some level. You've got super powers, you've got metal bodies, you've got magic, and even of those of you who are about to say "Oh, I'm just some ordinary human" - you're not. So many of you have amazing abilities with your weapons, brilliant minds that have led kingdoms and companies, you're all wonderful, and should be so proud of yourself. I'm proud of each and every single one of you.

... And all I can do is land a solid punch every now and then. Back home, I... I was on a team. My family. They all had their own special talents too, and when I finally came home, maybe some part of me wondered... if they really needed me after all, since they'd done so well without me for ten years. And now, here I am, and I can't even do the one thing I at least KNOW I'm good at, being a pilot. Here, I'm just... me.

[ She sighs, taking off her pilot's cap to run a hand through her hair. ]

Dang, I didn't mean to ramble. Just... I'm sorry. I'll try to make sure it won't happen again.

... 'Night, guys.

[ For anyone wanting to check in on her, she can be found in the lower-carriage of the library, wordlessly thumbing through her copy of the Junior Woodchuck Guide, though not really reading it. ]

Comments

[sos_pilot]

[ She raises an eyebrow, wondering where Hera's going with this. ]

... Something to be proud of.

[sos_pilot]

Well, he wanted to hear... "Okay, let's start with you. Got any magic or superpowers?"

[sos_pilot]

[ She gives him an amused look - yeah, he pretty much proved the point she was trying to make. ]

Nice try. I appreciate the effort.

[myblueskies]

Oh. His shinki. That means I work for him and when he calls my name. [He holds up his hand that has a red kanji emblazoned on it] I turn into a weapon so he can fight bad monsters with me.

[helborn]

[He makes a noncommital noise, a show of looking uncertain.]

... Half credit. I know it's hard when you're feeling low. I believe in you.

[flatteries]

[ Wow, talk about a total call out.

But Inigo knows it's a valid call out. It's just true. Inigo sucks at this just as much as Della does - or he may actually be even worse. Maybe he doesn't have the right to lecture her about it.

Even though he still tries to keep smiling, he visibly deflates a little. It's harder to keep up a cheery appearance today of all days.. ]

S-Sorry, Della. I know it's not easy, but.. I still want you to hear good things about yourself, even at the times when it's hard to accept them. Because you deserve to hear them..

[sos_pilot]

Please tell me you didn't instantly master it and become a pro in, like, three seconds.

[ But she is enjoying the story. It's nice to know more about Tidus and his world, and she's proud of how far he's come. ]

[sos_pilot]

Yeah, I've never really understood it either. But hey, I'm not going to complain about free stuff. Especially when it can help us all out.

[blitzcheer]

I'm pretty sure I swung the sword once and fell over. [ Wryly. As wryly as that deserves. ]

That's between you and me, okay? ... but what I'm trying to say is, well, [ to bring it back to being a little more serious, ] --it's alright if you're not the same as everyone else. You do what you can do, what you have to to survive. And you're already pretty good - you've got bigger guts than anyone I've seen! You don't hold back!

Why not just...let us help you out too?

[blue_ice]

We can't replace your boys. Just like no one can replace Mokuba.

[ He sighs deeply. ]

You're allowed to miss them. To feel it. But I'm going to feel it with you---that's not a threat, or me saying it's a burden, it's not.

[ He pauses. ]

Sometimes you need someone to sit in the dark with you.

[light_of_willpower]

Worried you'll go past your limits in a way that would hurt you?

[Because Trunks wants to understand, if he can.]

[theturksway]

[Well, at least she didn't ask about it. But he's still sighing with disappointment over the conversation as it is.]

It wasn't really meant to be about the Turks... if it was, there'd be a lot more of us here than just me. But I guess the train knew when to stop and go for something else.

Audio only

[subcircuits]

[The deep voice coming through in response to her broadcast is quiet and solemn.] The only thing I've ever been any good for at home is piloting. That's the-- the one contribution I could make to my community that mattered. And when I got here, I didn't know what the hell I was going to do without my rig. How could I possibly contribute on missions with all these metahumans and magicians on the field? I can throw a punch too, but in the end I am just some ordinary human. [Don't @ him on that.]

But...

[He falls silent, the moment stretching long enough that it's possible he's given up and disconnected. But then he laughs, soft and wondering, and continues.] I'm starting to realize that this train doesn't need people like me and you fighting. There are other things we can do. Things we don't even know we can do, that make a difference out there on the ground even if we're not punching bad guys.

If... I... could find something like that... I'm sure you can too.

[yondu]

Fair point. I guess especially in this case 'cause it'd be for communal use.

I admit I really enjoyed teachin' my boy to fly, an' he ended up damn good at it.

[The pride is part of why he enjoyed it, seeing him get it right.]

[sos_pilot]

... Is that right.

[ On the plus side, this is distracting from her sadness!

... By replacing it with pure, murderous rage.

Her eyelid twitches, doing her best to mask it.]

Does that... hurt you?

[averyusefultray]

I don't know about that. It's what's needed.

[The important part though]

But it means I know that what happened? Happens to a lot of people.

[goingthroughaphase]

[ She nods. ] I did, yeah.

[ She pauses, thinking wondering if she should jump straight into asking. Instead she smiles. ] Thought you might like some company.

[paopuofyourlife]

[This is something Kairi can kinda relate to. Sure she has a keyblade and magic, but when she compares to everyone else...]

I think I can honestly understand what you mean. I know a lot of amazing people back at home to and I wonder if my friends do better without me. But that's why I try my hardest to learn, improve and maybe find new skills so that I can consider myself on the same level someday.

So if you feel such a way, maybe we can try and find something else you enjoy and work on that. I at least believe in you, even if we don't know each other.

[guru_clef]

"I am nearly seven hundred and fifty, The Guru of Ceiphro and Ascended of Naut. Yes, I have magic. Your point being?"

[myblueskies]

It doesn't hurt lots. It feels funny because I'm the weapon but I'm also floating above and can see everything but I can feel what happens to me. Mister Zetta hasn't fought with me yet though because I haven't been his shinki very long and I couldn't help him on his mission... I turn into a motorcycle for him and I used to turn into a weasel for Elfnein so I think it might be different.

[10billionpercent]

I understand...

[ It's not often that Senku can say that when people are showing their emotions, but this one he painfully understands. He feels the same way after that mission. It was a horrible mission, really. Really terrible. ]

I am just an ordinary human though. [ He quips, it's a light joke. ]

I think that you have skills that only you can use, we just have to find a way to fit them in.

[Video]

[melodiouspacifist]

[ Yeah, okay, he feels bad about that. He feels bad about all of that. He wasn't that nice to Della - she made him - but still it wasn't very nice.

He knows.

It's a part of who he is though, and flirting with darkness is what he does. Also, he doesn't think she'd know why his magic inevitably failed, but that's alright. He doesn't need people fussing over him and his brushes with death.

He isn't sure what to say, he's not good at apologizing, and he's definitely killed this friendship, he's pretty sure.

So she can see him, he hestiates, but says nothing. He moves like he's about to turn it off anyway. ]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Yeah, I swiped it when we were on some space station mission. Pretty sure that was back before you were around.

[sos_pilot]

So I can use the last bit as something I'm half proud of.

[ She knows she's pushing it. Maybe a bit teasing. ]

... Not too shabby with leg-making.

[helborn]

That's a skill I never thought would be useful but it turns out, it is. One more.

[He's here for you, Della!]